By_shalini oraon
/ the distressing incident from Haryana.
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The Unmaking of a Celebration: Haryana Wedding Assault Exposes the Festering Wound of Entitled Misogyny
A wedding is universally meant to be a sacred celebration, a ritual of union, joy, and community. In a video that has now seared itself into the national conscience, that sacredness was violently stripped away in a Haryana village, exposing the festering wound of misogyny and caste entitlement that continues to poison the heart of rural India. The assault on a young naachnewaali (female dancer) by a group of men, including the groom’s relatives, for the simple act of resisting unwanted advances, is not an isolated incident. It is a stark, brutal microcosm of the power dynamics, gendered violence, and social hypocrisies that countless women confront daily.
The incident, captured on mobile phone footage that quickly went viral, is as enraging as it is clear. The dancer, a professional performing at the wedding, is seen being harassed by a male guest. When she resists and pushes him away, the scene erupts into chaos. Instead of being shielded, she becomes the target. A group of men, emboldened by the crowd and their own perceived impunity, descend upon her. They slap, punch, and kick her. They hurl abuses, their faces contorted with a rage that seems wholly disproportionate to her “crime”—the crime of asserting her bodily autonomy. The most chilling aspect is the backdrop: the celebration continues unabated for many in the frame, the festive lights and music creating a grotesque contrast to the violence unfolding in the foreground. It is a visual representation of a society that has normalised the spectacle of a woman’s humiliation.
Beyond the Video: The Anatomy of Entitlement
To view this merely as a case of “eve-teasing” or a spontaneous brawl is to miss the point entirely. This assault is a textbook demonstration of deep-seated entitlement. The men involved, reportedly from the dominant Jat community, operate from a belief system that views certain women as objects existing for their pleasure and consumption. The naachnewaali, in their hierarchical worldview, occupies a precarious space. She is hired to provide entertainment, a service they conflate with sexual availability. Her professional identity is erased, replaced by a perceived accessibility. When she defies this unspoken script, when she transitions from an object of the male gaze to a subject with agency, the entitled mind perceives it as an intolerable insult. The violence that follows is a punitive measure, a brutal reassertion of what they believe to be the natural order.
This incident cannot be divorced from its Haryana context. The state, known for its agricultural prosperity and wrestling champions, also bears the grim tag of one of India’s worst states in terms of gender ratio and crimes against women. The deep-rooted patriarchy, intertwined with rigid caste structures, creates an environment where such acts of public violence are not just possible but are, in a perverse way, expected. The Khap Panchayats, while sometimes in the news for opposing crimes, often propagate a social code that severely restricts women’s freedom and polices their behaviour. In such a milieu, a woman who performs on a stage, however professionally, is already navigating a minefield of judgment. Her resistance is seen as an act of rebellion not just against an individual, but against the entire social code.
The Political and Policing Response: A Familiar Pattern
In the aftermath of the video’s virality, the machinery of the state swung into action—a pattern now familiar in the age of social media outrage. The police registered an FIR, identified the accused, and made arrests. The political class condemned the incident. This response, while necessary, feels like treating a symptom while the disease rages on. The question that lingers is: would any action have been taken had the video not been recorded and shared widely? The likely answer is a disheartening no. The initial instinct in such situations is often to protect the powerful, to brush it aside as a “small incident” (mamla chhota hai), or to implicitly blame the woman for being in the “wrong place” or practicing the “wrong profession.”
This points to a systemic failure within the policing and justice infrastructure at the local level. The fear of the influential families, the pressure to compromise, and the sheer normalisation of such violence create a justice-delivery gap that videos can sometimes bridge, but never truly fix. True accountability requires a consistent, unwavering application of the law, irrespective of the accused’s social standing or the victim’s profession.
A Profession Shamed, A Resilience Ignored
The public discourse around such events often unfairly scrutinises the profession of the female performer. The term naachnewaali is sometimes uttered with a sneer, laden with moral judgment. This ignores the economic reality of these artists. For many, this is a legitimate profession, a skill that provides a livelihood in a landscape with limited opportunities for women, especially those from certain social and economic backgrounds. They are entertainers, not targets. By focusing on her profession, society attempts to create a hierarchy of victimhood, where some women are deemed more “assault-able” than others.
Yet, in the face of this overwhelming adversity, the dancer’s act of resistance is a powerful testament to a changing India. She did not submit; she fought back. In that moment of pushing her harasser away, she embodied a courage that the mob lacked. Her subsequent decision to pursue legal action, forcing the system to acknowledge her pain, is part of a broader, albeit slow, shift where women are no longer willing to suffer in silence.
The Haryana wedding assault is a national shame. It is a reminder that economic development and modernisation are hollow if they do not dismantle the archaic foundations of patriarchy. The real celebration will not be in the arrests made, but when a woman can perform her art, walk down a street, or simply exist in a public space without her safety being contingent on the whims of men. It will be when a wedding’s sanctity is defined by the respect shown to every individual within it, not violated by the brutal entitlement of a few. Until then, the festive lights of that Haryana village will continue to illuminate a darkness India has yet to conquer.